Thursday, January 03, 2008

Cavegirl: Jezebelle Bond

Star of Teenage Cavegirl Jezebelle Bond was 25 when the film was made. She was born Jessie Walters in California and decided to become an exotic dancer after watching Showgirls and Striptease (er..). She realised that the big money was only earned by established porn stars and so started appearing in adult films in 1999.

Oddly, like a lot of porn stars she has Native American blood. It's probably something to do with them being some of the poorest people in America. I saw a documentary about the adult film industry once and they said that the one thing that these girls had in common was that they came from grindingly poor backgrounds.

She has 13 tatoos which for me is 13 too many. I can't understand why attractive girls seek to permanently deface themselves with these things. It seems prevalent in the porn industry and these girls seem to consttantly add to their collection. Weird.

I found it very hard to find any pictures of her where she wasn't showing her bits but these two showcase her cute face, perky bust and superb posterior.

But how does she rate as a cavegirl? Firstly her outfit is pretty cute although it looks more native American than cavegirl. It is far too neatly made and doesn't have the requisite "just ripped off the animal" look of the best fur bikinis. It also seems to made of some sort of printed material which is highly inauthentic.

Jezebelle, as an optimistic 34B, doesn't have the figure of Raquel althought at 5'6" she is the same height.

But I liked her Stone Age spear, which she hurled at the ropey CGI Tyrannosaurus Rex (I hate people who call it T Rex. Trex was a margarine in Britain when I was small.)

Your polygons are showing, mate

So, I don't like your tatoos but you look quite fetching in your little outfit (and, indeed out of it) so..

Cavegirl Rating 5/10.

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