Whilst One Million Years BC didn't exactly have a huge budget it must have been like having Titanic's compared with what was available to the makers of "erotic" cavegirl film Teenage Cavegirl.
This 2004 direct to DVD film was directed by Fred Olen Ray. Given that he has made over eighty films and his best known is called Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers (1988) you can imagine the quality level.
Really the best Cavegirl in fur bikini shot in the film.
It's not a fur bikini! take it off!
In the meantime Sharon decides Tahra needs a bath (although actually she looks clean as a whistle).
She talks Tahra out of her clothes and into the bath.
Meanwhile caveman Tiko has also gone through the time portal, wormhole, stargate, thingy in search of Tara. He bumps into a SUV (literally-for a porn star he has a reasonable sense of physical comedy) where he watches two really quite unattractive people having sex. These people don't appear again and don't add anything to the plot (what there is of it) and the woman has particularly nasty looking silicone breasts.
Later, Cynthia and Dr Matthews kidnap Tahra so they an make all the money from their discovery. At this point we have an awful lot of plot which results in Tiko connecting Dr Matthews to his own fiendish device and draining all his memories. Cynthia (who has changed sides like all fickle women), Sharon and Richard believe that the only thing to do is send the cavecoupleback to their own time.
They drive back to Bronson Canyon which gives the three girls the chance for a threeway with Tiko in the back of the RV whilst the clueless Richard drives the bus. Tahra and Tiko jump back in time and reveal a twist which owes much to Roger Corman's Teenage Caveman (1958) -which was also filmed in Bronson Canyon.
Teenage Cavegirl is just about watchable (once) and, for me, that was largely down to the presence of Kennedy Johnston (or Danielle Petty, which seems to be her real name) who is the best thing in the film. A striking woman who reminded me of both Sean Young and Jennifer Connelly. She was 34 when this film was made and looks like a real woman (as well as being a proper actress not a porn star) in a cast of otherwise airhead (and largely silicone) bimbos. I think I actually laughed three times which is not a great rate for a comedy (even a sex one). Other than the bath scene most of the sex scenes were pretty lame too.
The DVD is fullframe (as it was filmed) and has no extras other than a few stills (I have never understood the purpose of stills on a DVD). The picture quality is very good however.
As a cavegirl in fur bikini film it does have one cavegirl and her bikini is quite nice if not even trying to be authentic (using One Million Years BC as the source of authenticity). It loses points for being set mainly in the present but at least they made an attempt with the CGI dinosaurs.
But all in all we can only give it: 3/10